i don't know where you come from, but you're everywhere i go

having the most happy times back in leeds.

i'm fully loving being back in leeds again, which I know must mean i rely on my amazing friends to be happy, but i don't care. being back with everyone is the nicest feeling.

i'm going to fully enjoy this year, as it's the last one we may all have together, but lets not think about it at all.

this little end to freshers has been sweeeet.

otley run check. night out with my 103 girls check. night out with lots of vodka and dancing check.

also have had the most lovely days chilling, catching up, drinking and a loveeely day trip to the countryside.

perfect. very happy today, and hoping it continues :)

buh bye

Bx

P.S if my bosses are reading. which they very definitely aren't. ANSWERMYEMAIL. dicks.

norfolk

just back from a lovely weekend away to my parent's new caravan in norfolk with my mum and my gran. such a nice few days get-away with the 3 generations of lady buchanans!

i spent most of the 3 days reading novels

wandering around royal gaff's

and walking along windy and rainy beaches

and absolutely loved not being in leeds or leicester (no offence!)

i needed just a breather to get away from everything and i even forgot my charger so literally got a bit cut off from the outside world, which actually turned out to be quite frustrating.

now that i'm back its been a kick straight back into the real world.

what has happened to one of my best friends over the weekend is terrifying and horrific and a reminder that you can't stop evil things happening.

i'm so angry i wasn't able to be contacted over the weekend bowls, but if your reading, i'm really glad it wasn't worse :) loveyouuu!

and now this week i have lots of catch ups planned. reaaally excited to see chloe on weds, it's been far to long since we've seen each other and i'm sure we'll spend hours chatting absolute nonsense! and then straight up to leeds on thursday to celebrate the end of freshers, but for me it will be the end of the worst summer of my life and a start of final year with everyone back that i love!

i'm excited for the next few weeks, i've got a feeling good things will come :)

here's hoping.

Bx

P.S student finance, i've your reading. wire me my loan now pleaseeeee.

rest in peace.

god bless all of those who tragically lost their lives in the awful terrorist attacks across America on this day, ten years ago.

i've been thinking a lot for those and their family and friends today.

may they find the strength to get through today

and may such evil attacks and horror end soon.

i've been completely tearing up at the memorial live feeds, but now i'm off to church.

it's hard today, i'm struggling to understand how this could be allowed to happen.

i hope i find answers.

Bx

"We just had a near-life experience, fellas."

evening sir.

this week has felt quite nice. a couple of the girls in my new flat have moved back in and whilst we haven't all been spending every spare moment with each, its been nice to occasionally bump into them and have a chat and the flat has a different feel about it now. rather than the complete nightmare of the past month or so.

the other night i watched fight club with shabana. so good!

not gonna lie, i wasn't expecting to enjoy it, i was expecting full on hours of violence, but i found the storyline was reaaally inspiring.

as you know, i'm a sucker for a quote and my fave ones were:

"Fuck off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let... lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may."

and... "Only after disaster can we be resurrected."

brad pitt looks HOT in it too, like actual fit.

also this week i have finished my sisters keeper... absolutely bawling! such a good book though, i recommend it - it's different to the story of the film, i think if i'd have seen the film after the book, thinking back i would be disappointed, i think i prefer the book now.

and i've immediately set upon another jodie picoult novel, securing my new status as complete book nerd. seriously, people need to come back to leeds. immediately... and i spent a fiver i dont really have on the new issue of vogue, just because adele looks properly amazing on it! i haven't even read it yet, i've just looked at her pictures, in a wow what an icon, not lezza way.

finally, this time next week i will be at home, packing for a trip to the english sea-side.

this is the second most excited i've been all summer. i genuinely cant actual wait for get on that sodding wet rainy beach and get the fuck away from everything.

yayayayayay.

still really really missing everybody but looking forward to resuming hopeful normality before this summer started, very very soon.

lots of love,

Bx

you need me, i don't need you.

"they say i'm up and coming like

i'm fucking in an elevator"

you need me, i don't need you

-ed sheeran.

TUNE.

Bx

... not that I don't need all the absolute babes in my life. i love you all ♥

"But never doubt that I love."

This weekend has been so lonely!

But not really in a sad way, i've kept myself busy and had lovely texts and messages from people to cheer me up. I'm trying to see it as the calm before the storm anyway, because people are starting to come back to Leeds and I have a few trips lined up for my week off in a couple of weeks, so it's nice I guess to just chill and spend some time relaxing on my own.

Yesterday I went and bought My Sisters Keeper in Waterstones and sat in Starbucks for an inappropriate amount of time just reading and reading. There were times, i'm not gonna lie where I genuinely forgot I was still sat in a cafe. Then I took myself to the Leeds city gallery. I've been dying to see the Damien Hirst stuff for quite a while, so it was great to get a chance to see it. I'm really interested in his pharmacy work, as working in a pharmacy for over 3 weeks made me often wonder about the parallels in art and medicine.

Surprisingly, it was the older artwork that I completely fell in love with though. My absolute favourite was Leon Richet's "Moretz Sleeping Place." The scale of such a lovely painting and then the intriguing depth and general calmness of it was amazing. God, i'm such an art nerd.

Anyway I then came home, made myself a curry and bawled at the X factor and laughed away at Adele, before completely falling asleep ridiculously early for a Saturday night.

Today, I have sat with a coffee and carried on reading My Sisters Keeper for hours. I'm glued! It's so sad, but so beautifully written. My favourite quote so far is:

"Shooting stars are not stars at all. They're just rocks that enter the atmosphere and catch fire under friction. What we wish on when we see one, is only a trail of debris."

I sat and thought about these few sentences for aages. No wonder it takes me ages to read a book. However, i'm over half way through which is well impressive for me!

Anyway, now i'm off to go and pick up my laundry then make an early tea before church.

Laters bitches,

Bx

"I'm not lonely, I'm alone."

Hey.

Thought i better do a quick bloggo post seeing as i'm meant to be bringing it back.

I've had a completely lovely couple of weeks.

I've caught up with the most amazing friends, been to Nottingham on a cheeky 21st, had Sumner and Bowls visit me for a whirlwind few days midweek and had a surprise visit from an old "well what would you call him, rebecca?" flatmate-ish back in Kirbs.

All in all, it has slightly cured me of my boredom of life and its depressing stuff from over the past few months. Well its helped take my mind off it for five minutes at least.

I think i'm fully ready to just smash out next year at uni now and get my degree with the amazing people I still have around me and just kick off my next adventure. (Italy is already becoming an obsession. If I am not in Rome this time next year, I have no idea what i'll do.)

Anyway, also this weekend I went to see the amazingly romantic and yet horribly sad "One Day." Absolutely heartbreaking and so realistic. Waaah, I want a romance like in the films please. Although without the sad bits. Even in the car home I was still sniffling, god.

Also I rewatched (500) Days of Summer and The Duchess. I'm turning into a mess for films again. Thats what being a right loner does to you, friends need to come back immediately!

And this weekend I am spending it completely on my own for the first time well, in around 2 months I think. I genuinely can't remember the last time. I've been so so lucky this summer to always have friends visiting or friends to visit or a home to go back to and to escape. Even the most gorgeous lovely weddings with tons of family around me. But this weekend, even though it is a best mates birthday, money problems mean I can't go anywhere.

So i've decided I'm going to take the bus into town on Saturday and buy a cheap novel and sit in the corner of Starbucks all morning. Then i'm going to find the nicest cafe in Leeds and treat myself to lunch. Then in the afternoon I am going to finally visit Leeds Art Gallery (i am such an awful design student, I still havent been in over 2 years!) and just enjoy being by myself and not think about things too much.

Then on Sunday, sod it all. I'm having the biggest lie in you can even imagine. Then I'm sitting around in my pjamas all day, watching even more depressing or romantic films. Then i'll probably go to St Georges in the evening and get some of that amazing faith back.

So thats a cheeky update.

I don't think anyone even reads anymore though. I'm a bit done with it myself. It's funny to read back on though, so maybe in a few months time I'll read this back and think paaaah.

Anyway, buh bye...

Bx